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Monday, July 31, 2006 

Cutting my losses

At approximately five o clock this evening (four pm GMT), I broke the nail on the thumb of my left hand. To my general irritation and displeasure, it conspired that the nail had not broken off entirely; it had merely broken half way and given up. This gave me the ever fickle gift of hope. Those who know me will probably not think about my nails at all. They're there on the end of my fingers, so what? Well, I don't take great care of my nails in the French manicure and endless stress over the state of my cuticles sense of the word, but I do keep them a pleasant length (approximately five millimeters, but who's counting?) and take some pride in the fact that for minimum care I have pretty good, even, and reasonably clean nails. Thus, the breakage of said nail was pretty catastrophic.

Now, normally I'm a "cut off and cease the problem" kind of girl. But lately I've been taking a little more care over my appearance. I've spent a fair amount of cash and time to get this look (hours spent sunbathing, trips to hairdressers with the pram and praying to god that the kid doesn't wake up while I'm in there, bin bags full of cash on a new wardrobe, jewellery, and the most gorgeous pile of shoes I will ever come across) and I don't intend to fuck up my "actually gives a shit" look simply because of a hang nail. That’s right kids, I've become my sister.

So we started the operation for recovery. First to be tested was the nail bandage. A sweet and easy combination of a piece of weird white stuff that normally can be found under the hems in practically every piece of clothing, and nail glue. I was dubious. The bandage was cut to size, shape, and placed over the nail, but the glue was dried out and so the nail bandage solution was abandoned.

Secondly we went for professional nail acrylics. You take the acrylic on a paint brush then dip it into this tub of white powder until it forms a pearl, then apply to the nail. You paint it on until it forms a pearly film over the nail, and leave to dry. Once dried it must be filed and buffered to the right shine and distribution. Needless to say, it took me three attempts and most of it ended up on the table.

Finally, after filing and buffing the bloody thing until it looked like my nail had weird cross hatchings across it and was about as smooth as sandpaper, I gave up and painted all of my nails in pale pink varnish to hide the damage. Voila, one slightly lumpy thumb nail, but the nail was attached to my finger, and the acrylic was as solid as promised.

Or, at least, that’s what I thought. That’s what I thought right until I turned the computer on using my thumb and half the acrylic and nail varnish cracked right off, leaving a lumpy mess and a still very much broken nail. The moral of the story: cut your losses while you’re behind because nail kits are utter shite and no matter how much you care about something, unless you’re a professional it will all go wrong anyway.

Today on msn’s news was the following:
Lebanese flee during battle pause
WP: U.S. risks backlash in Mideast
Olmert says no cease-fire
U.N. warns Iran over nukes
Oil spill on Russian export pipeline

Sort of makes me feel bad that I spent the entire evening worrying about a hang nail.


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  • An albatross can fly for thousands of miles without getting tired. I've always thought that love is similar to flying, therefore we should aspire to be like the albatross.

    I don't know if I can do that. So far I haven't been so lucky. But one day I'll test my wings with someone, and flying won't be so hard after all. Or so painful.
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    * In 2001 one New Zealand fishing boat killed over 300 seabirds in just one trip, while fishing for ling.
    * Each year over 300,000 seabirds are killed by longline fishing.
    * Over the past 60 years some albatross populations have declined by 90%.
    * Annually around 10,000 albatross and petrels are caught in New Zealand waters alone.
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