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Friday, June 16, 2006 


My horoscope tells me that Pisceans have split personalities.

"One fish can be seen to be the fish that wants to return to a state of deep unconsciousness. This fish wants to go back to the deep sea, where all there is to do is to eat, procreate and sleep.

"The other fish wants to swim to the light. It senses that to follow this longing to return to the state of oneness, as felt by them in the womb - with the added ingredient of awareness - of conscious knowing - is their potential awakening."

I'm superstitious. I generally don't pay much attention to horoscopes because I'm a scientist too, the astrology of it doesn't work with the universe expanding. But if my tarot cards tell me to watch out for having an accident, or there are a number of things that happen consecutively like breaking a mirror and falling flat on my face when trying to leave the house to go there, I take them as signs.

That horoscope worried me though. I guess it makes sense, occasionally you have to come accross one that sounds like you. If just because there are so many variations that it is impossible for there not to be one that sounds vaguely right.

Today my tarot card was the chariot. "It means a union of opposites, like the black and white steeds. They pull in different directions, but must be (and can be!) made to go together in one direction. Control is required over opposing emotions, wants, needs, people, circumstances; bring them together and give them a single direction, your direction. Confidence is also needed and, most especially, motivation."

Tell me I'm insane. Tell me my superstition is idiotic and that there is no such thing as serendipity. Yesterday I told you I was torn. Today I'm no better, in fact I'm probably worse. I'm torn in half, torn between which one of me to listen to, and torn between a lasting friendship and just throwing it all away. And I don't know what to do.

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Um...I'm not sure that astrology belongs to the category of things to be superstitious about, but I do believe that the stars have some kind of influence on our lives and who we are.
But split personality...I think we all have two or more sides to our personality no matter what. Don't take it literally. It's all about discovery and how to find out who you are in your own way. And the astrology you'll find online is nothing but entertainment...if you can call it that.

Like everything else astrology is upto those who does the interpretation.
I don't know how old you are, but you have a lifetime ahead of you and it's full of adventures and surprises :) Enjoy it because it's shorter than you can ever imagine.

As for the friendship...well, they are precious when they work and it can be very painful to walk away from. See it like this: if the friendship is stopping you from growing as a person and if it's holding you back, it's not worth hanging on to. But if it does bring something good into your life, make it work if there's a problem (which I assume there is). There's an answer to every problem.

Two words: Mumbo and jumbo.

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  • An albatross can fly for thousands of miles without getting tired. I've always thought that love is similar to flying, therefore we should aspire to be like the albatross.

    I don't know if I can do that. So far I haven't been so lucky. But one day I'll test my wings with someone, and flying won't be so hard after all. Or so painful.
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    * Each year over 300,000 seabirds are killed by longline fishing.
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